- sad beyond comfort; inconsolable
- disappointed; dejected
I wouldn’t, perhaps, go as far as saying I’m inconsolable, but “disappointed” and “dejected” are certainly accurate descriptions on my current frame of mind.
A log-standing friendship has recently come to an end. It was one that was particularly special to me. I don’t know the reasons behind the other person’s decision to end it and, given that they have blocked me on the various social media channels over which we used to communicate, the chances are I am unlikely to find out.
In a way, this underlines the intrinsic fragility of the online friendship, even where there is an “in person/real life” element to it. If one of the parties involved decides to end the friendship/relationship abruptly, they can do so, leaving the other party at a loss to why it has happened.
Did I say or do something that hurt them? I will almost certainly never know; and if I did, I will never be allowed the opportunity to attempt to put right whatever wrong it was I did them.
There is always a sadness and sense of loss associated with ending, but it is heightened by the fact that the reasons for the ending are, and will almost certainly remain unknown.
I bear no resentment towards the other person, nor do I wish them any ill. There is a deep sadness that it appears that they did not place the same special importance on our friendship that I did, but I have no control over such things. I wish them well in their life.
I will continue to hold the memories of friendship dear and, in time, those memories will hopefully help to diminish the pain of that friendship’s passing.
The disconsolate feeling that accompanies this ending will, in time, fade.